Friday, July 8, 2011

Acceptance...


The coffeemaker is brewing a pot of coffee to which I'm looking forward very much. It is spitting the last drops of water into the filter and I will be able to fill my cup in just a second. It will be most satisfactory to drink because I just had a cup of heated up coffee and it wasn't so very good. I knew it wasn't going to be, but I had it anyway. I was too discombobulated when I first got up to make a proper pot. 

I didn't hear the first birds start to sing, but now I'm listening to the latecomers. They don't sound nearly as enthusiastic, as if they're just putting in their time. It all sounds rather halfhearted. The first birds really make a concert of it and are jubilant. They sound like a hallelujah choir that greets the day wholeheartedly. 

Thank god today is Friday. All I have left to do are the dishes and to hang up the clean laundry. Those are not unsurmountable chores. They are within reason. The bed's been changed and I had the pleasure of sleeping under clean sheets last night. That was after I watched 'A Touch of Frost' which was on late.

It was a satisfactory episode and nothing too complicated, although it did have a twist that I didn't figure out until the last minute, but then again, I'm not a big sleuth and do like to be surprised. It was a good old fashioned thriller. The kind that makes you want to have cheese and crackers and a good glass of wine while you watch it. 

I've accepted the fact that I've had to increase my medication after having decreased it not too long ago. It seems that I don't do well enough on a lesser amount in the long run. I can see the sense of that and I hope my psychiatrist can see it also. I have to write him an email about it today. 

It's always nice to try and do with less and for a while it seemed to work, but this is the second time in a few weeks that I've gotten into trouble and I think that's too often. I become dysphoric and it is highly uncomfortable. I don't think that's the way I'm supposed to exist. It's supposed to be easier than that. 

I'm having a lovely glass of cold milk now and very nice it tastes too. I'd had enough coffee. It really only takes two cups to get me in the right state of mind as a rule. I'm going to do my chores before I go back to bed for some more sleep. The domestic help is going to be here today and I have to get up on time before she gets here. I do need to come to my senses before she walks in. 

There's not going to be an exciting thriller on this evening. There will be a Belgian police series on and they are as bad as the Dutch ones. They don't compare to the British thrillers. Then there's going to be 'The Music Fest on the Square.' That's all Dutch music and that's about as bad as it sounds. It doesn't suit my taste, but a certain segment of the population seems to really enjoy it. 

Right, I'm off. Have a great day. 

Ciao,
Nora


2 comments:

Maggie May said...

Sometimes we have to take medication even though we don't like the idea of upping doses. Sometimes its about compromise.
I'm getting increasingly dependent on pain killers even though I'd rather not take them. It sometimes feels as though you are being taken over, doesn't it?
Hope your Friday goes well.
Maggie X

Nuts in May

Wisewebwoman said...

I hope you had a good nap, and much as we don't want to sometimes (I'm in the same boat) we have to take the meds. I am back on the one I took away (Crestor) as my cholesterol reading went through the roof.:-(
XO
WWW